Have you ever wondered why there are so many languages in the world? We have commonly spoken languages like English, Chinese, and Spanish. But we also have body language and programming language, etc. Language has always been one of the bridges between ourselves and others – human or not. It allows us to express ourselves, our feelings, wants and needs.
Sometimes, we fail to point out how we’re feeling. It might not be because we’re unsure, but rather, our lack of emotional vocabulary restricts our ability to express ourselves better. In the book Atlas of the Heart, Brené Brown shares her research results and all the different emotions we feel when we’re happy, upset, or angry.
Atlas of the Heart: List of Emotions
Here is a list of the 87 Human Emotions & Experiences from Brené Brown’s research.
By expanding our vocabulary list, we’re helping others understand our feelings better and crucially get the help we need. Take a visit to the doctor as an example. Your shoulder is aching, and you can’t quite explain how besides that “it’s bad”. Now if you’re the doctor, a bad shoulder won’t be very useful to make a diagnosis. However, if you tell the doctor that it’s throbbing or you feel shooting pain, they might be able to make a more accurate diagnosis.
The 3Ps: Personalization, Permanence, Pervasiveness
Now that you’ve learned the importance of language, here are 3 quick tips to help improve your resilience when facing emotional challenges. It’s called the 3Ps.
- Personalization: Think, is this really about me, or am I taking it too personally? What outside factors play a role in this?
- Permanence: Ask yourself if this will matter 5 years from now? 5 months? 5 days? Will it still be a big deal in 5 minutes?
- Pervasiveness: Stop and consider the real impact. Will this affect your relationship or even ruin your life? Most probably not.
With these 3Ps, you’ll learn to build up resilience and remember that things might not really be such a big deal. It might not matter in 5 minutes or have any impact on your life. Sometimes it’s all just in our head.
To Conclude
Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to expand your emotions vocabulary list and practice resilience with the 3Ps method. By improving our language, we can connect with others better and understand ourselves deeper starting from our feelings and emotions.